This week's alternate casting is another merchandising giant of the 80's, He-Man.
*This will be a live action version that will actually take place on Eternia not Earth, like that crappy 1987 version with Dolph Lundgren.
He-Man and the Masters of the Universe:
Prince Adam/ He-Man: Brendan Fraser (Okay, okay I guess it's obvious but I just love Brendan Fraser, he's such a talented actor and better than that he has comic timing and that's no small feat.)
Voice Cringer/ Battle Cat: Bill Murray (He's already played one big screen cat why not another?)
Teela: Jolene Blalock (Enterprises' resident Vulcan seems like she could hold her own with Teela's fighting staff, not to mention look pretty smart in that costume.)
Man at Arms(Duncan): James Cosmo (He's got that great gruff warrior veteran look about him that I think would work so well for Duncan.)
Voice of Orko: John Waters (Not that he'd ever do something like this but he has just a quirky enough voice to give Orko some life and maybe a shit fetish.)
Ram-Man: Jack Black (I had the overwhelming urge to cast Willem Defoe for obvious in-joke reasons, you know cause he's supposed to be legendarily endowed...but I went with Jack Black figuring Ram-Man would probably be more comic relief than hero.)
The Sorceress: Ornella Muti (sexy and mysterious)
Skeletor: Jason Isaacs (He has the best voice, possibly the most seductive voice on an actor since George Sanders and since the person who'll be playing skeletor will be under a ton of makeup the majority of the acting will have to be done through his voice. Not to mention he's a sexy bastard.)
Voice of Mer-Man: David Thewlis
Voice of Beast-Man: Ewan Bremner
Voice of Tri-Klops: Michael Clark Duncan
Voice of Trap-Jaw: Vinnie Jones
Evil-Lyn: Maggie Chueng (Evil-Lyn was always my favorite when I was growing up and Maggie has the right combination of sexiness and fighting ability to do this character justice.)
As always I'd love to hear your casting ideas.
Becca
Monday, May 30, 2005
Alternate Casting #2 He-Man
Posted by Becca at Monday, May 30, 2005
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1 comment:
You know, I'm convinced now that only way you could do a movie version of "Masters of the Universe" is to ambrace how inherently gay it is. I mean, it is really, really gay. Doing one of those big, overblown Bazz Luhrman movies might actually tone the thing down a little...
Anyway, here's my own cast for a very gay version of "MotU."
Prince Adam/He-Man: Brendan Fraser would have been good before he got all fat. But since this is a movie about homos, I guess Colin Farrell seems appropriate it. Except that I hate him so fucking much. How about Ralf Moeller, who played Conan on TV? Even gayer, Prince Adam could be Aaron Carter.
Voice of Cringer/Battle Cat: Someone over-the-top. Patrick Warburton.
Teela: Fledgling gay icon Scarlett Johansson.
Man-at-Arms: Tom Selleck. With a big moustache.
Voice of Orko: I guess John Waters works. Or you can go really silly and make it Martin Short. Or Rip Taylor.
Ram-Man: Ron Jeremy.
The Sorceress: Cher.
Skeletor: This could be anyone, really. I mean, shirtless and dyed blue, how gay can you get? Jason Isaacs is too good an actor for the vein I'm flowing in right now. Instead, Rupert Everett.
Mer-Man: Joe Pantoliano.
Beast-Man: Fabio in fur, baby.
Tri-Klops: Orlando Bloom, obviously.
Trap-Jaw: Vinnie Jones would be good, but not in a gay version. Instead, this could be Jason Isaacs. Or Tim Curry.
Evil-Lyn: Current dyke-on Gina Gershon.
Well, I am straight, so that's as gay as I could come up with. Did I say gay enough times? Gay gay gay.
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